Saturday, February 27, 2010

Adam

Adam pointed out I wrote a post about loving my mom and even one about loving our cat Brinkley, but I have never written about him.  I have thought about writing about him many times. Especially about how supportive he has been through everything. It just feels like such a big post that I kept putting it off.

I have been on a lot of different hormones through the years and it wasn't easy on him or me. I got sick from many of them and he always took care of me. When he had to give me shots, he did it like it was no big deal. He took off from work and sat in the hospital all day everytime I had to have surgery. He went to every single RE appointment we had. He went to countless OB/GYN and oncologist appointments, procedures, biopsies, etc.

The time I had an allergic reaction to the fertility meds and ended up hemorrhaging blood, he took me to the hospital and never flinched at all the blood. It was a lot and it was everywhere. (I ended up losing half of all the blood in my entire body.) He stayed with me the whole time and was calm about it. He acted like it wasn't embarrassing. (Trust me, it was.) I had to be hospitalized for 3 days and he stayed with me the entire time. He is 6' 6" and slept in a chair next to my bed.

When we got married, we laughed at the vows in sickness and health and for richer or poorer. We already knew all about sick and poor. (We actually made up our own vows that we said to each other right before walking down the aisle.) It takes some couples a lifetime to go through all the bad stuff we experienced before we were even married. It was enough to make any sane person want to run away, but he stuck by me. Always there for me and always taking care of me.

I can't wait to see Adam as a father. He had a rough childhood. He is going to be the kind of father his father never was. He has already been reading baby books and talking about all the things he wants to do with our children. I know it's not the same, but seeing the way he is with our cats really shows me what kind of father he is going to be. We took a baby care class together and watching him swaddle a baby doll and learn how to change a diaper made me fall in love with him even more.

I love that we have the same feelings on politics and religion. I know it works for some couples to be opposites, but for me it's important that we have the same basic beliefs. Our love for animals, taking care of the environment, gay rights, etc. There are a few basic things that I am very passionate about and he is just as passionate about it as I am. I love that.

The thing I love most about Adam is that I can completely be myself with him. We have so much fun together. We make up songs, dances, and jokes. Silly stuff that only the two of us would think is funny. We laugh a lot. I never have to worry about how I act. I am completely myself. He's seen the good, the bad, and the ugly. He has unconditional love for me.

When we found out I needed a hysterectomy, he immediately was fine with it. He made it clear I did not need to worry about him in the decision. He is completely happy with our decision to adopt. He said he honestly didn't even want to risk a pregnancy with me. Nothing is normal with my body and he was worried a pregnancy might end with me hemorrhaging and dying. He was always afraid of something happening to me. He was more than happy to say goodbye to the thing trying to kill me. It really helped me to know I didn't need to worry about how I was letting him down by not being able to give birth to our children. He continues to remind me of that.

Now don't get me wrong, we fight. Sometimes a lot. We are both very stubborn and have no problem finding things to fight about. We have been together 9 years and we have had plenty of bad fights.

But, he is absolutely the love of my life and I have no doubt we are meant to be together. I feel lucky to have found him. I know we are a team. Everything we have been through has just made us stronger.

7 comments:

  1. So nice to read this, I am glad you have a true soulmate on this roller-coaster journey you are on!

    ReplyDelete
  2. That was awesome. You two are so lucky to have eachother. He seems like such a special person!

    ReplyDelete
  3. As always articulate and beautiful! Eventhough you may have never posted about your love for him, I knew from various postings on FB how special he is to you. I can't even imagine having to go through what you have been through, it would wreck most marriages! You are so lucky, he sounds like a great person!!! Keep up the good work!!! :-)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Beautiful post, Lisa. You two are so lucky to have found each other. It sounds like you have a wonderful partnership.

    ReplyDelete
  5. This post brought tears to my eyes. It is beautiful! I would love to repost this on my site...let me know if you are intersted. You and him are such strong people. I admire that. Like you said in vows...when you say in sickness and in health you have to mean it. Alot of good and bad may come our way...but its having a strong partner by your side that is important.

    ReplyDelete
  6. What a beautiful relationship and marriage you have! thank you so much for sharing such a personal and touching post with us. It brought a tear to my good eye (lol). I am so glad that you two have each other.

    ReplyDelete
  7. what a beautiful post. I have tears in my eyes from reading it. thank you so much for sharing it with us all (and also, for me, it was good how you admitted that you still do fight. sometimes i forget that even happy couples have arguments) <3

    ReplyDelete