When you go a long time without blogging, it feels like when you finally do post it has to be something big. Lately all I have been doing is random update posts. And lots of pictures. It's been a long time since I have really sat down and wrote a blog post. I have kind of lost my blog voice for two reasons. One is that I don't have the time. The second is because someone gave me hell for one of my posts and I have been afraid to write ever since. Not just a random troll but someone who did things to me personally in my real life too. Even though it happened almost two years ago, if I am being honest, it ruined the whole experience for me. My blog has not felt like a safe place for me ever since. It used to feel like home. Or at least a comfortable therapist's office. Now it feels like a big cold empty stage with a bright light on me.
I do know I would like to start writing more. I feel like maybe if I commit to write a little each day, even if it's something small, I'll get my blogging groove back. But I know that won't happen. I just don't have the time. It's hard to justify blogging when I know I have Etsy orders people are waiting for.
I write blog posts in my head all the time. Often when I am working on an order, I'll think I just need someone to come in and take the post from my head and type it on my blog. Where can I get that service? How come you guys can't just see into my brain?
I guess another option is to just shut down my blog. Stop letting it sit here making me feel guilty all the time. Or maybe move to somewhere private to write.
I really don't know what the answer is. All I know is I want to stop feeling bad about it.
I'm going to try to come back tomorrow and really write. If I can manage that, maybe there is hope for my blog after all.